An Unfortunate Misunderstanding
by Hellsleprechaun
Summary: Damon recieves an unusual text telling him that Stefan is in a relationship with Klaus. His older brother instinct kicks in and he and Elijah begin investigating their brothers, while Damon hunts for Klaus.


**I do not own the vampire diaries, it belongs to L.J Smith and the CW.**

"What the hell?" Damon Salvatore looked down at his phone with narrowed eyes. That was impossible…. Surely. No, no way.

He stared harder at the text he had received from Elena, as though doing so would change what it read: _Just saw Stefan making out with Klaus!_

"What is it?" Alaric asked warily but with resignation. He knew there was a good chance that he did not want to know, but he also knew he had to be ready to jump up at any second to run to somebody's rescue.

Damon held up the phone mutely for him to see, he was confused for a few seconds and re-read the message before beginning to laugh hysterically.

"In what universe is this funny?" Damon demanded incredulously.

"Damon, it's auto-correct!" Alaric got out between guffaws.

Damon sat still for a second and then he too began to laugh with relief. He texted Elena back, "_auto-correct's a bitch!" _

Less than five seconds later his phone beeped again, "_that wasn't auto-correct."_

"Well, this is pretty awkward." Alaric commented.

Damon stormed into the Salvatore boarding house, slamming the door shut violently behind him. "Stefan!" He yelled, glancing quickly around the living room, it was empty. "Stefan!" He shouted, louder this time. Still no answer.

He raced up the stairs and into his brother's room, he wasn't there either, not that Damon was truly surprised. He was furious, he could not believe that his little brother was making out with Klaus, _Klaus, _the hybrid dick, who had killed Jules, Jenna and Elena. Not to mention turned him into the ripper again, and taken him with him when he left town for two months.

_Huh, they were probably together this whole time. Maybe back in the twenties too._

He grimaced at the thought and tried to bully his brain into shutting up, it did not work.

_You know, making out won't be the worst thing they've done together. _

"Shut up." He told himself. He did not want to think about Stefan with anybody that way, male or female, but certainly not _Klaus_. He gazed around Stefan's bedroom, not sure what clues he was looking for exactly, _I love Klaus _or _Mr Stefan Mikaelson_ written all over his journal, but something. He sped towards the cupboard and wrenched it open, grinning triumphantly as he saw the pile of tattered old diaries belonging to his brother. He sorted through them quickly until he came across the one from the current year. He opened it and flipped to the first page: _Damon, did you really think I'd hide my diary somewhere so obvious?_

Damon groaned with frustration and hurled the fake diary across the room, where it hit the wall, fell to the floor and it's pages scattered.

_It's not so weird, _he tried to rationalise. _So Stefan didn't want you reading his diary, that's nothing out of the ordinary. He never wants you to read it, you just do anyway._

_Don't kid yourself. He just didn't want you reading all about he and Klaus' blossoming relationship._

Damon pounded his fist against the front door of the Mikaelson mansion without pause. After thirty seconds or so the door was yanked open by an irritable Rebekah.

"What do you want?" She sneered as he pushed past her into the house. "What are you doing? Do you have a death wish?"

"Where's Klaus?" He snarled, ignoring her questions. The hybrid was insane of he thought he was ever going anywhere near Damon's brother again.

"Not here." She responded curtly.

"What's going on?" Elijah suddenly appeared, smartly dressed and calm as usual, but gazing at Damon with suspicion.

"Where's Klaus?" He repeated.

"Niklaus is not here. What's the problem?"

Damon appeared uncomfortable.

"Rebekah, go to my wallet, take as much as you like and amuse yourself for an hour, please."

She sighed but cheered up as she considered just how much her oldest brother kept in his wallet.

Once she was gone, Elijah invited Damon into the living room and the two of them sat down on the sofa, as though about to have a civilised conversation about the next council meeting.

"So, now that my sister has gone, what has Niklaus done?"

"Where's Kol?" Damon wondered, he did not want that nosy little bastard to be listening in.

"He's also out." Elijah seemed to be slowly losing his patience. "What has Niklaus done?"

"My brother. " Damon snarked.

"Excuse me?" Elijah looked as though, if he were less sophisticated, he would have chocked on his drink.

Damon continued, " were you aware that my brother and your brother have been… " He trailed off, he wasn't sure of exactly what they'd been doing.

Elijah raised on eyebrow, "you know Damon, most people find it easier to converse when they actually speak in complete sentences."

"I got a text from Elena earlier saying that they were making out."

Elijah's eyes widened slightly- an extreme reaction. "Are you certain? Maybe Elena misinterpreted what she saw, or perhaps you misunderstood her." He suggested reasonably, although it was clear he thought the second option much more likely.

"The text said, _Just saw Stefan making out with Klaus! _How else am I supposed to interpret that?" If Elijah knew, he really wished he would share.

"Ah." He was stumped for a moment but quickly recovered. "Perhaps she was playing a joke on you?" He was still fairly cool about the whole situation, drinking his tea and speaking in a level tone.

"You've met Elena right? She's getting as bad as Stefan. She does not make these kinds of jokes, she's not as hilarious as me." He smirked.

"Or perhaps she is merely not as much of an arse as you." Elijah said with a small slightly mocking smile. When he saw Damon's agitated expression, he grew more serious. "Are you telling me that you actually believe this? It's ridiculous. They hate each other." He pointed out logically.

"Or they pretend to hate each other." He theorised. "Think about it: they've never actually properly attacked or harmed each other, they are together quite a lot, and they're always making cutting innuendo laced comments."

Elijah conceded to that by inclining his head.

Back at the Salvatore mansion Stefan walked through the door to instantly come face to face with his brother. "where've you been?" He inquired, staring accusingly at Stefan as though he were on trial.

"I was at the grill." He replied, staring at Damon as though he'd lost his mind.

"All day?"

"What is this, Damon? Yes, I was there al day." He shot Damon an odd look before walking past him into their living room and sitting down on the couch, where he flipped open a car magazine.

"Alone?"

"What?" He asked distractedly.

"Were you alone?"

"Not all day ,no. Seriously, Damon what's wrong with you?"

"There's nothing wrong with me."

"You're acting like a psychopath." Stefan disagreed mildly.

If Stefan had not known Damon as well as he did, then he would have jumped in shock as Damon was suddenly right next to him on the sofa. "Are you hiding something from me?" He was not going to pretend that he and his brother had regular heart to hearts, however he liked to think that Stefan didn't keep things, things that were not necessary, secret from him.

"Like what?" His face scrunched up in bewilderment.

"I don't know…" Damon tried to sound casual, "a new girlfriend, or just a new friend. Or perhaps an _old friend?"_

Stefan watched him for a very long moment before turning his glance around the large room, "are we speaking in code or something?"

Damon gave up his ignorant pretence, "I know. Don't try to deny it, Elena told me."

Stefan's eyes widened as he ran through all the possibilities of the humiliating things Elena could have told Damon about him.

Damon gave a fake and slightly menacing laugh, "do not pretend to be shocked. She knows, Rick knows, _I _know and Elijah knows."

"I wish you'd let _me _know!" Stefan exploded.

"Fine. I know about you and Klaus."

Stefan raised his eyebrows, before he could ask his clearly insane brother to elaborate, Damon carried on talking.

"You are never seeing him again, even if I have to lock you in this house forever." He dictated in his best don't-argue-with-me tone.

"What the hell are you talking about? Are you drunker than usual?"

Damon did not answer, instead his hand shot out, quickly and painlessly snapping Stefan's neck. He grabbed his brother's body and hauled it down to the cellar, where he laid him on the bed before closing and locking the door and throwing a bottle of animal blood and a bag of human into the cell.

He smiled grimly, now all he had to do was find the hybrid.

Elijah felt a wave of guilt as he stole into Niklaus' empty bedroom, this was not the kind of behaviour he would usually condone, but he could not simply forget about what Damon had said, he needed to know if it were true or not. It wasn't impossible he supposed, his brother's tastes had been… varied in the past, but it still seemed unlikely.

He walked to the bedside table where he spied Klaus' sketch book, the place where he drew out his private thoughts and feelings. Something he rarely allowed any of them so see. He sighed and grabbed the pad, he flipped through it carefully, not wanting to ruin any of the pages. Most of the images were not particularly surprising, a few landscapes, some of the family at different stages of time, mainly as humans, some of Rebekah in the 20s, one of Tatia, a couple of Caroline Forbes. He was giving up hope of finding anything useful when his breath caught, he could hardly believe his eyes.

On the page in front of him was a picture of Stefan, carefully drawn, with particular detail on the eyes, and a wide smile lighting up his face, Elijah only noted these details after getting over the shock of Stefan being completely naked.

Well, this was damning evidence, he concluded.

Damon was stalking through town, hunting for the blonde original, when his phone beeped, it was Elijah telling him that Klaus had returned to the house. He was about to run back to his car, when his eye caught Elena.

Ten minutes later, he was dragging the protesting doppelganger into the Mikaelson mansion, where Elijah and Klaus stood watching them nonchalantly.

"Damon, let go!" She growled, he complied and she glowered for a second before turning to Elijah. "Elijah, what's going on?"

"Klaus and Stefan are in a _relationship_." Damon announced scornfully, his eyes burning into Klaus, _if looks could kill. _He thought wistfully.

"What?" Nik seemed both amused and genuinely surprised.

"Oh my God! Since when?" Elena gasped, both Elijah and Damon stared at her in shock.

"I don't know, you're the one who told me." He reminded her, she looked at him blankly.

"What are you talking about?"

"You texted me."

"Damon, I haven't texted anybody, my phone has been missing since Friday."

As Damon was thinking, Elena was attempting to work out what was going on, Elijah was feeling that he had spent his day worrying about nothing and Klaus was laughing, Rebekah strutted through the front door, Kol following close behind.

"Look who I found." She called out as she walked into the living room, her gaze flickered across them all. "Why is he still here, and what's she doing here?"

"There was an… unfortunate misunderstanding." Elijah stated, pointedly ignoring Niklaus' loud chuckling.

Damon stopped listening to Rebekah's questions and instead dialled Elena's number, maybe the idiot who had set up this whole thing would be dumb enough to answer. He whirled around as he heard a ringing sound from behind him, emanating from Kol's jacket pocket.

"So you're the one behind all of this?" Damon demanded, torn between anger and a reluctant respect for Kol's ability to mess with them all.

"I can't take all the credit." He admitted faux humbly, "Rebekah helped, she sent the text."

"Then who drew this?" Elijah pulled a sketch pad out from behind a fancy cushion on the sofa, and held up a drawing of his brother- naked.

"Not me. It's terrible, not to mention unrealistic." Klaus objected. "Look at him- he's smiling, and whoever drew it has been _very _generous, well in certain departments anyway, I'm almost certain that Stefan's nipples are not shaped like that."

"You can't blame me for that. I've never seen his nipples and I can't help but forget that everybody isn't blessed with being as well-endowed as I am." Kol bragged.

It was a little over an hour later that Damon let Stefan out of the basement, where he had been furiously waiting for an explanation, and told him about the days events. Stefan seemed to be both incredulous and slightly amused at the… unusual events of the day.

"Don't act so surprised. Are you telling me that you and Klaus never got it on back in the 20s?" He joked mockingly.

Stefan looked at him incredulously and laughed, "you are such a creep sometimes."

Damon sniggered, patted Stefan on the shoulder and stood up to get a drink, it was only when he was half way across the room that it occurred to him that Stefan had not said no. After a brief pause he decided that sometimes it was better not to know.

**The end.**

**There was no real point to this, it was just an idea that refused to leave me alone.**

**Please review.**


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